“Let's hug it out, b*tch. "

“Well, my girl won her debate on Friday, my boy scored a goal on soccer on Saturday and my wife agreed to visit her mother without me. I don't know how things could get much better!”

“I've been working steady for the past 12 years, minus the last three.”

“Call me Helen Keller because I'm a f***ing miracle worker!”

Justine Chapin (Leighton Meester): “You're gonna have to work for it.”

Vince: “I got into this business so I wouldn't have to work.”

“Listen, Lloyd, I want you to put all my files, folders, binders, everything into a box! If you find a used condom, an executioner's mask, and a f***ing spike paddle, don't think, just pack that b*tch! Chop suey!”

“Nobody appreciates their girlfriend until they get herpes from the next broad.”

“I didn't go to the Lakers game because they were playing the f***ing Bobcats… I came here today because I thought this was a session on how my wife could learn to communicate.”

“Don't talk to us like we're adopted, bro.”

“Got MILF?”

Ari Gold: “What the f*** are you wearing?”

Lloyd: “I'm trying out new looks! This one's my Andre 3000. You like?”

Ari Gold: “No, I don't. You look like Michelle Kwan in drag. Why don't you do a triple axle over the phone and try calling Cameron again?”

“We are gonna get drunk with Russell Crowe and we're gonna head-butt some g**damn kangaroos.”

Eric: “We had break up sex, all right?”

Johnny Drama: “Break up sex? Never heard of it.”

Eric: “Yeah, I mean… you know… you have sex and… that's it. You say goodbye.”

Johnny Drama: “… That's the only kinda sex I have.”

“I'll beat that old f*** and throw him in the pool! [to his young kids] … Only Daddy speaks that way.”

Vince: “He's my agent, you can't go around threatening people E. We're not back in high school.”

Eric: “He called me pizza boy!”

Vince: “Well, you were the night manager at S'Barros, weren't you?”

Johnny : “I'd take it in the a** for an Oscar.”

Turtle: “You'd take it in the a** for a guest spot on the 'Hughleys'!”

“From now on, ask my permission before you bang one of my assistants.”

“I've had most of this town, so it was bound to happen that our trees would dabble in the same forest at some point.”

Eric: “Ari, I'm getting killed here. Vince isn't happy.”

Ari Gold: “Of course he's not happy. Nobody's happy in this town except for the losers. Look at me. I'm miserable. That's why I'm rich.”

“I drove to work in an $80,000 Mercedes, and I'm going home in a prop car from the 'Fast and the Furious.' I just don't see it, Lloyd…”