Selena Gomez’s Biggest Revelations from ‘My Mind & Me’ Documentary

Selena Gomez is sharing her most vulnerable moments with the world in her new Apple TV+ documentary “Selena Gomez: My Mind & Me.”

The star gets candid about her bipolar diagnosis, how she moved past her relationship with Justin Bieber, and even her secret crushes on fellow Disney stars Cole and Dylan Sprouse!

In the film, opening up about her bipolar struggles, she recalls being diagnosed while in treatment.

Gomez had canceled her Revival tour in 2016 and was suffering from anxiety, panic attacks and depression connected to her past lupus diagnosis. She entered a Tennessee psychiatric facility and her former assistant recalls in the doc how Selena was having suicidal ideation during that time.

Theresa Marie Mingus shares, “At one point she's like, 'I don't want to be alive right now, I don't want to live.’ And I'm like, 'Wait, what?' It's one of those moments where you look in her eyes and there's nothing there. It was just pitch-black and it's so scary."

Her friend Raquel Stevens adds, "I just remember it being chaotic and she was hearing all of these voices. [They] just kept getting louder and louder [and] that triggered some kind of psychotic break. If anyone saw what I saw and the state she was in at the mental hospital, they wouldn't have recognized her at all."

It was during that stay in treatment that Selena was diagnosed with bipolar disorder.

She says, "I'll be honest, I didn't want to go to a mental hospital, but I didn't want to be trapped in myself, in my mind anymore. I thought my life was over. I thought this is how I'm going to be forever."

In footage from 2019, she looks back at that time period, saying, "I'm in a better place, but I don't know. I guess sometimes I can't explain it for sure. I needed to keep learning about it, I needed to take it day by day."

Her mom Mandy Teefey shares that she learned of Selena’s mental break in 2016 from TMZ.

"They called me and wanted to know what my daughter was doing in the hospital," Mandy says, getting emotional. "She didn't want anything to do with me and I was scared she was going to die."

Teefey adds, "You hang on as tight as you can and try to help them with their treatment and that's the hardest thing to do, to just go to bed and hope that they wake up the next day. It's a miracle she got out but there's always that fear that it's going to happen again."

Selena says despite lashing out at her mom and stepdad Brian Teefey during that time period, they kept on loving and supporting her. “I keep saying thank you and I'm sorry,” Gomez says.

As for her relationship with ex Bieber, she recalls how writing “Lose You to Love Me” with Julia Michaels and Justin Tranter helped her through that time.

"It's about more than just a lost love," Selena said. "It's me learning to choose myself, to choose life. But also hoping that people can find grace and peace in that, too. The song is about knowing that you completely lost every part of who you are, just to rediscover yourself again."

Gomez doesn’t use Justin’s name, but also shares, "I felt haunted by a past relationship that no one wanted to let go of. But then I just moved past it. I wasn't afraid anymore."

"I feel like I had to go through the worst possible heartbreak ever and then just forgetting everything at the drop of a hat, it was really confusing," Selena explaines. "But I just think that needed to happen and ultimately, it was the best thing that ever happened to me."

On a lighter note, Selena confesses to crushing on the Sprouse twins when she was a teen!

While visiting her childhood home in Grand Prairie, Texas, she shares, "I had a crush on Cole and Dylan Sprouse, so I'd come in my closet and I would write things down.”

Selena and Dylan actually shared a kiss when she guested on “The Suite Life of Zack & Cody” in 2006, but apparently, she was a little more into Cole. She finds his name with a heart around it, joking, "I'm sorry, Cole, if you ever see this!"

To go along with the doc, Gomez also released an emotional new song called “My Mind & Me" to go along with the doc. Listen below! Fans can also hear a mix of commentary, stories and music on a limited-run channel on Sirius XM called Selena Gomez Radio, launching November 4.

On Wednesday, “Extra’s” Terri Seymour spoke with Selena at the premiere of her documentary “Selena Gomez: My Mind & Me.”

Selena told her, “I’m feeling really good. I am not gonna lie, I am a little shaky just because it is me sharing a lot.”

Terri commented on how raw the documentary is, asking Selena why it was important for her to share so much. Gomez said, “I think it was an accident. I think I wanted to create a documentary at first about maybe my music and my tour, then when I kept having these hard moments in my life where I had to stop shooting and I chose myself… In those moments, I realized I want to share my vulnerability and ['Truth or Dare' director Alek Keshishian] and I went to Kenya and traveled the world and it just created a life of its own and ended up being this story about, hopefully, mental health.”

Terri, who like Selena has lupus, asked the star if she is in remission.

“Yes, I am,” Selena said. “I’m doing really, really well.”

The doc shows her in a lupus flare-up. She said, “It’s definitely hard… It was actually scary, too. I didn’t know when I was going to stop feeling that pain.”

The star also shared her bipolar disorder diagnosis, saying, “I didn’t want to be afraid of it anymore… I just wanted to tackle it because I feel like there should be conversation and it should be normal.”

Terri asked her, “Have you learned to love yourself? Do you love yourself now?”

Selena lit up, replying, “I actually do. I really do."