Colin Jost's Zingers & Heartfelt Grandpa Story from the White House Correspondents' Dinner

Colin Jost delivered the keynote roast of the 2024 White House Correspondents' Dinner Saturday, and he did not shy away from ribbing President Biden, who sat just a few feet away — while going much harder on an absent former President Trump.

Jost brought up the sore subject of President Biden's age, a major stumbling block in polling as the 2024 presidential election nears. He joked that Biden, 81, remembered the American Revolution and that school newspapers did not exist when he was in high school.

He went on, "The last time I was in D.C. I left my cocaine at the White House," referring to a scandal in which a bag of coke was found at the White House last July. "Luckily, the President was able to put it to good use for his State of the Union. I am kidding, of course. The president doesn’t call it cocaine. He calls it high-speed rail."

But he turned things back sharply on Trump, quipping, "I love that Trump’s two attacks on President Biden are that he’s a senile old man and a criminal mastermind. I think you got to pick one. It’s not like Trump himself is young and sharp. I am not saying both candidates are old, but you know [99-year-old] Jimmy Carter is out there thinking, 'I could maybe win this thing.'"

“Let me see if I can summarize where this race stands at this moment,” Jost said. “The Republican candidate for president owes half a billion in fines for bank fraud and is currently spending his days farting himself awake during a porn star hush money trial... and the race is tied?!”

And Jost did not leave himself and his wife, Scarlett Johansson, unscathed! First, he joked to VP Kamala Harris' husband Doug Emhoff, "As you can tell by all the comments about my wife, I am also used to being the Second Gentleman."

He later jokingly encouraged everyone to approach Scarlett, who he said "hates privacy."

Most surprisingly, Jost ended on a sweet note, talking about his late grandpa, a Staten Island, New York, firefighter for 40 years who died recently at 95.

Jost revealed to President Biden that he was the last person for whom his grandfather had ever voted.

“My grandpa voted for decency, and decency is why we’re all here tonight,” Jost said. “Decency is how we’re able to be here tonight. Decency is how we’re able to make jokes about each other and one of us doesn’t go to prison afterwards."

President Biden brought his own jokes, including the instantly viral, “The 2024 election’s in full swing and yes, age is an issue. I’m a grown man running against a 6-year-old.”