Prince Harry Was ‘Against’ Royal Role as a Kid: ‘It Killed My Mum’

Prince Harry just revealed he didn’t want to be a royal after the death of his mother Princess Diana.

Diana died in a horrific car crash in 1997 alongside her boyfriend Dodi Fayed and their driver as they tried to flee from paparazzi in Paris.

Harry, who is on an unofficial royal tour of Australia, was the keynote speaker at InterEdge Summit at the CENTREPIECE venue at Melbourne Park on Thursday, where he spoke about grief and loss.

According to PA Media, he said, “In my experience, loss is disorienting at any age. Grief does not disappear because we ignore it. Experiencing that as a kid while in a goldfish bowl under constant surveillance, yes, that will have its challenges. And without purpose, it can break you."

"There have been many times when I’ve felt overwhelmed," Harry confessed. "Times when I’ve felt lost, betrayed, or completely powerless. Times when the pressure — externally and internally — felt constant. And times when, despite everything going on, I still had to show up pretending everything was okay, so as not to let anyone down."

The Prince added, “For many years I was numb to it, and perhaps that was easier then, but I also didn’t yet have the tools to deal with it.”

Harry said the army helped him, explaining, "It was during my time in the army that I began to understand something more clearly. In the military, you quickly learn that resilience is not about pushing everything down, it's about building the capacity to deal with what comes up. Discovering a potential within that you never knew you had."

After his speech, he spoke with Australian business leader Brendan Nelson and opened up further about losing his mom.

Harry recalled she "died just before my 13th birthday,” saying that afterward, he didn’t even want to be a royal.

"I was like, ‘I don’t want this job. I don’t want this role — wherever this is headed, I don’t like it,' " Harry said. “It killed my mum and I was very much against it, and I stuck my head in the sand for years and years. Eventually I realized, ‘Well, hang on, if there was somebody else in this position, how would they be making the most of this platform and this ability and the resources that come with it to make a difference in the world?'"

Harry added, “And also, ‘What would my mum want me to do?' And that really changed my own perspective.”

Harry has not only lost his mom, but is also in the midst of a royal rift with his father King Charles and brother Prince William.